Breaking: Absolutely Nothing Happening Whatsoever
Now that the World Series of Poker Main Event has played down to a final table which will reconvene in October, the poker media are bored out of their minds as they wait for the European Poker Tour to kick off.
“I mean, I guess there’s some stuff going on online,” said poker journalist Barry Sharter. “Someone, y’know, won a Sunday Million [his eyes light up] ooh, is there an anniversary one of those coming up? They have about three or four of those a ye- no? Ah, nevermind.
“I just wish they’d move the WSOP back a bit so we could at least have watched the Euros while nothing was going on in the world of real sports played with cards and chips.”
Poker media in disarray
Many mainstream poker media sites have given up entirely, with several news portals having simply closed down their pages and displaying only an automated ticker reading “X days until EPT Barcelona” next to a picture of that mustachioed clock from Beauty and the Beast.
A brief moment of excitement threatened to disrupt what some in the media considered a well-earned break when a WCOOP schedule was announced, but the word “tentative” and the fact that it could be ignored until September meant the tumbleweeds continued rolling.
World Poker Tour event reaches final table, apparently
Following this dearth of action, the World Poker Tour took to social media to let everyone know that they had an event going on and actually it was at the final table.
“I’m not sure how everyone missed this but you can catch all the WPT action here,” they tweeted, before being summarily dismissed as a hoax, since everyone knows the World Poker Tour hasn’t been around for at least forty years.
Article credit: Matt Perry