John Hesp Designs Poker Masters Jacket

In a stunning announcement, Aria Hotel and Casino has revealed that the inaugural champion’s jacket for its new poker series, Poker Masters, will no longer be designed by custom clothier Waraire Boswell.

Instead, Aria is turning to John Hesp, the 4th-place finisher at this year’s WSOP Main Event, to design the garment in the spirit of his foul-fashion suits.

Viewers and poker professionals alike knew Hesp for both his charm and his sartorial style. The suits that he wore, called foul fashion, can only be described as “hobo-wear” or “punishment for lost prop bets.”

“It’s all in good fun,” said Hesp, while throwing paint on canvas for inspiration. “If you can’t look foolish at a poker table, where can you look foolish at all?”

Hesp is designing the jacket to be a waistcoat, rather than a blazer, and have a minimum of repeated colors or styles. In fact, most clown outfits will have better color coordination than the prize. Hesp wants people to identify the champion from distances up to a mile.

Aria, for its part, is reinforcing the move by requiring the champion to wear the jacket to six branded events during the course of the coming year. After the year is up, the jacket will be retired to the newly-constructed Hesp Hall of Fame, where it will adorn a custom Madame Tussaud wax likeness of the champion for decades to come.

Several prominent players who planned to play the high rollers event are now reconsidering, due to the sartorial holocaust that will befall their wardrobe should they win.

“My God,” said Brian Rast. “I can’t…I can’t even…I mean, I can’t be photographed looking like that. I can’t let my wife see me like that.”