The Pearly Gates, Heaven – We have just received word that poker player
Sam Grizzle, who
passed away suddenly this week, has been granted automatic entry into Heaven. According to our sources in the afterlife, Grizzle received the free pass from judgment due to the fact that he punched out
Phil Hellmuth during his lifetime.
Grizzle fast-tracked
Instead of enduring the usual entry process at
St. Peterโs famous portal, Grizzle was shuffled out of line by several cherubim and hustled through a side entrance to Paradise. Other souls awaiting entry found the move curious but did not dare to entertain jealousy for fear of being denied their reward.
Grizzle was reportedly escorted to Heavenโs eternal poker game and seated at a table with former
President Harry S. Truman,
Chip Reese,
Gavin Smith, and
Mike Sexton. All four, who now occupied their noncorporeal forms and seemed to be made mostly of brilliant light, welcomed the new player to the game and immediately dealt him in.
According to
BonusCodePoker's senior afterlife correspondent, the order to admit Grizzle came down from the
Almighty Himself. Although God the Father loves all of His children unconditionally, including Hellmuth, He decreed Grizzleโs 2008 punch to the Poker Bratโs face in the Binionโs parking lot be venerated as a bit of divine justice.
As a result, Grizzleโs entry into Paradise was secured. He will also be commemorated in one of Heavenโs many pavilions, which commemorate great acts of valor undertaken in life.
What's next?
Grizzle, who was perhaps the most-aptly named poker player outside of
Chris Moneymaker, will now spend eternity in the bosom of the Lord. In addition to playing in the aforementioned poker game, he will dine on ambrosia and nectar, experience delights beyond the scope of human imagination, and needle the various angels and luminaries who sit at his table.
Heโs reportedly enjoying himself but is already struggling with Heavenโs ban on swearing.
Bet ยฃ10 Get ยฃ30 in Free Bets
Bet365 Review ย โ Min Deposit: ยฃ5ย ย โ Expiry: 30 daysย ย โ Min Odds: 1/5 (1.20)ย
Sign up, deposit between ยฃ5* and ยฃ10* to your account and bet365 will give you three times that value in Free Bets when you place qualifying bets to the same value and they are settled. Free Bets are paid as Bet Credits. Min odds/bet and payment method exclusions apply. Returns exclude Bet Credits stake. T&Cs, time limits & exclusions apply. The bonus code BET247 can be used during registration, but does not change the offer amount in any way. Registration Required.
Bet ยฃ10 and Get ยฃ30 In Free Bets
William Hill Review ยป โ Min ยฃ10/โฌ10/$10 stake ย ย โ Expiry: 30 daysย ย โ Min Odds: 1.5
18+. New customers using Promo code TOP30 only, Min ยฃ10/โฌ10/$10 stake, min odds 1.5, free bets paid as 2 x ยฃ15/โฌ15/$15, free bets credited after settlement of first qualifying bet, free bets will expire 30 days after the qualifying bet is settled, payment method/player/country restrictions apply.
DEPOSIT ยฃ10 GET ยฃ60 FREE PLAY
GG Poker Review ยปย โ Min Deposit: ยฃ10ย ย โ Limited periodย ย โ $1 for ever $ in Rake
18+ GGPokerโs game currency is USD ($), other currencies such as GBP (ยฃ) are only used for illustrative purposes. Welcome Bonus and Honeymoon promotion for new players only over a limited period. Welcome Bonus only available to new players that make an initial deposit. Minimum deposit is $10/ยฃ10. ยฃ60 Free Play offer made up of $52.50 in free All-In Or Fold SNG tickets from Welcome Bonus and $2.50 in free tickets from Daily Freebie. Free tickets automatically credited to eligible playersโ accounts over a 6 period. A 100% matched deposit bonus worth a maximum of $600 can be claimed by players selecting โMatch Bonusโ when making their first deposit(s) over a limited period. Bonus cash is released at a rate of $1 for every $5 paid in net rake/tournament fees.