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March 26, 2013

AGA Accuses PokerStars of Being “Totally Rigged”

PokerStars vs the AGANEW JERSEY — The American Gaming Association (AGA) fired another salvo in their battle with PokerStars today via a brief accusing the online poker site of being “totally rigged.”

This is the second AGA filing opposing PokerStars’ casino application in New Jersey.

“WTF,” the brief opens, “we have NEVER scene [sic] such a OBV SCAM SITE.”

“UNREAL the COOLERS, BEATS. SO rigged.” the brief continues. “EVRY TIME  the money all in THIS RIGGED SITE n it defys MATHAMATICAL PROBABILTYS.”

The New Jersey Department of Gaming Enforcement confirmed receipt of the document. “This afternoon, we received the AGA’s brief,” said a DGE spokesperson.

“If you can call it a brief. It was one long paragraph written mostly in caps. And the appendix was a bunch of MS Paint images.”

In addition to general charges that PokerStars is “100% GuARNTEED RIGGED,” the brief also levels a number of specific – and damning – allegations, including:

  • PokerStars’s RNG is “BUSTO”
  • It is “[expletive] IMPOSSIBLE to win with [expletive] ACES on this [expletive] [expletive] piece of [expletive] [expletive] site.”
  • People should “just FOLD sets” because they are “gonna LOSE BIG your gonna see.”

PokerStars responded to the news with a brief statement:

Whatever, dicks.


Below: An image included in the appendix to the AGA brief.

AGA-brief-appendix

ALSO READ: Nevada Offering Online Poker License With Caesars Buffet Purchase

Article credit: Staff