Parody Poker News

Negreanu Hit With Lawsuit Over “Fraudulent” Nickname

Joe Krisberg October 25, 2017

As he approaches 44, is Daniel Negreanu being disingenuous by letting people continue to call him "Kid" Poker? A recently filed lawsuit says yes.

Phil Hellmuth Wins King of the Hill; Sauron Pissed

Sauron Abandons Middle Earth, Phil Hellmuth White Magic Era Begins

David Huber October 18, 2017

Phil Hellmuth enjoying new levels of confidence after Sauron abandons Middle Earth in the wake of Phil Hellmuth's September King of the Hill win.

Quoting Rounders Is Literally Only Skill Man Has

Keith Woernle October 2, 2017

A man who has been rejected for 350 jobs but has watched Rounders nearly 1000 times wonders why he hasn't been able to land a job.

$1 billion guaranteed at home game tournament from garage

Man To Host $1 Billion Guaranteed Poker Tournament From Garage

Joe Krisberg September 25, 2017

A Californian man has announced plans to hold a $1 billion guaranteed tourney from his garage. He will keep adding flights until the guarantee is reached.

Fedor Holz Crowned 2018 Poker Masters Jacket Winner

Next Year’s Poker Masters Jacket Already Awarded to Fedor Holz

Keith Woernle September 25, 2017

Since Fedor Holz will win the 2018 Poker Masters Jacket, PokerGo and Aria have announced they will be forgoing the formalities and award it to Holz now

Hellmuth Beheaded, Several Other Deaths Reported At Westeros Poker Open

Joe Krisberg September 12, 2017

Poker brat and 14 time WSOP champion Phil Hellmuth has met an untimely demise during the Westeros Poker Open. Hellmuth was among several pros beheaded.

Half Of Poker World Already Completely Forgotten Who Qui Nguyen Is

Keith Woernle August 21, 2017

We think Qui Nguyen won the WSOP Main Event in 2016, but we're not sure. Can anybody confirm if Nguyen won it that year -- we're at a loss.

Poker Masters Champion Jacket To Be Designed By John Hesp

Joe Krisberg August 14, 2017

The John Hesp jacket was all the rage during the WSOP. Now the bloke has parlayed his newly found fame into a gig designing the new Poker Masters jacket.

Exclusive Interview With Chris Ferguson: “I Keep Cashing Just To Piss You Off”

Keith Woernle July 24, 2017

Apparently, Chris Ferguson had like 194 cashes at this year’s WSOP. After each one, he smiled softly because he knows just how much it tilts you.

Real-life Mike McDermott Kinda Wishes He’d Stayed In Law School

Keith Woernle July 21, 2017

“OK, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker who dropped out of law school to pursue poker, then you are the sucker.” - Rounders (Miramax), 1998

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